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Five emotions invented by the internet

My favorite of the bunch is the first one: “A vague and gnawing pang of anxiety centered around an IM window that has lulled.”

During this time an individual feels unsure whether they have offended the IM recipient, committed a breach of IM etiquette, or have otherwise spoilt the presentation of themselves carefully crafted thus far thanks to the miracles of the textual medium. The individual must be at least vaguely aware that they are being vaguely paranoid, and must tell themselves things like ‘he probably just stepped away from the keyboard’ or ‘I know she is at work right now so perhaps she has stopped replying because she is busy.’

A possible sixth emotion might be “Unnecessary pagination irritation”, which emotion I experienced reading this otherwise fine article. :(